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Life
Haiz... Suddenly feel very down because of certain things... I got a question in mind but i dunno whether i should ask him or not... I dunno... Suddenly juz wish to be alone... I've got a feeling tat moii heart is being thrown from the sky straight down to the valley bottom... I feel so empty now... Because i felt tat there's alot of doubt tat i dunno whether i wan to clear.. I noe i might be thinking too much again... But... I juz couldn't help it when i think i heard something which i shouldn't... The moment i accidently heard it i could feel moii heart drop from the sky to the valley bottom... The emptiness stays within miie from the moment till now... Alot of tots starts to buried miie... I start to think alot of things again... I start to doubt... I dun wish too... But moii heart starts to doubt... Doubt abt something... Something might be very important or could be nothing at all.... I dun wish to speak up now... I dun have the courage too... I wish to noe the ans and yet i dun dare to face it... Coward was wat i will use on moii self now... Cause i felt totally not miie now... I'm not who i am now... I'm now juz an empty shell... I tot everything will be fine... But nv did i noe.... Nv... I dun wish to drop moii tears again... But... The moment i type this entry, moii tears starts to drop... The moment i wipe moii tears it starts to drop again.... Yes... I'm crying now... But moii heart is not juz crying... It's bleeding... I tried to act calm earlier on in the day... Trying to act as in i heard nothing... But the moment i type this i can control anymore.... But tat's the only way to let out the pain in miie... Once again i felt totally lost... I feel so alone now... Alone in darkness... A place where moii heart bleeds again... I dunno if this bleeding will stop... Or... I will continue to bleed till the day i pass away . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
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Cheyenne
21st
this year
